Warren Sapp Attacked by a Shark

Warren Sapp, Perhaps the most popular of Defensive linemen in NFL history was bitten by a shark yesterday. Luckily Warren is at or above his playing weight and can stand to lose some lbs one way or another. I guess if I were that fat, a shark bite might be the way to go. You lose a large chunk of fat, get a gnarly scar (everyone knows, chicks digs scars), and you feed an endangered species. He posted this picture right after it happen…

Doesn’t seem to be any hard evidence that he was bitten. I don’t want to call conspiracy theory quite yet but if we dive a little deeper into Warren Sapp we might find a reason he would make up this story…

First let’s look at the pros and cons of his Public reputation

Pros:

  1. Pro Football Player
  2. – pro bowl player
  3. – Super Bowl champ?
  4. – sack expert
  5. Fat and Funny
  6. Wealthy

Cons:

  1. Arrested for biting GF
  2. Arrested for soliciting a hooker
  3. Cried after being arrested

by the looks of it this may have been a set up. Sapp hasn’t had the best PR lately so this was the ideal time to drop some “I survived a shark attack” news on a lazy July day. Wait what’s that? There is a picture. Oh ok well good for Sapp surviving a baby shark attack. looks like he’s having lobster with a side of shark for dinner.

-Doc

@blog30tweets

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